How Can I Stop Myself From Gossiping?

I am the office gossip and I messed up pretty badly with my boss. She asked me to do her a favor (not stating it was confidential, but I should have realized) and I opened my big mouth once again. I have yet to see her, but this could be a major problem as far as trust goes (or she may just blow it off - maybe not realizing how the information got  out - keeping my fingers crossed for this).  

It wasn't a major thing, but still it was something that could have been told by her if she felt like it. I am striving to not gossip, but it can be very hard at times. I have resorted to writing things down, telling friends outside of work (they don't care, but at least I get it out) to stop myself from saying things at work. My boss, in the past, has called me a big mouth!  I didn't get too mad, because it's true.  But to do it again - I feel so stupid. 

Another small point - this gossip, it's not restricted to people I don't like, it can be good, bad, about my best work friend, even myself! The only thing that seems to stop me is someone specifically saying "this is confidential".  I have started to ask people if things said are in confidence, but this gets ridiculous after a few times.

Signed,

The Office Gossip

Dear Gossip:

How refreshing it is to meet one who 'fesses up.  Your recent passing along what should be kept quiet should be another wake up call.  You can not undo that gossip, but you can ask yourself why.  Why do you tell everything you know?  Probably, your answer to that question is that you want to show that you are in the know.

How might you channel that need to be informed to a need to make a contribution to your work unit and organization?  Rather than being reactive--telling what seems to be something others do not know--might you initiate conversations with your coworkers on such topics as:  

• How well are we serving our customers/clients?

• I've been wondering if we could cut out some of our paperwork or simplify the forms we are using?

• Are there ways we can cut costs?

• What ways have delighted our customers this week?

You won't live down the loudmouth label until you are indeed more reserved and discrete.  Don't let that worry you.  It is past if you make it past.  Smile, laugh gently at yourself, offer to help when needed, and congratulate yourself the next time you look in the mirror because you are seeing the person you want to become.

WEGO happens when one become two and two becomes more who are committed to working together.

--Bill Gorden
Workplace Doctors

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