Should I Date A Co-Worker?

  I work in a government job and we are all professionals, I have been advised that it is not a good idea to mix dating and work. Do you have any advice? By the way there is no difference in the so-called power structure of the intended date.

--Amorous in the Workplace

  Hello Professional Looking to Mix It Up:

The advice you have gotten is typical of the "avoid-at-all-costs" anything that might trouble the organization mindset. Management does not want you, and that includes your hormones, to have even an inclination for companionship with a co-worker.

That advice is not without much wisdom: Universities such as Yale have banned any dating between faculty and students. Many a harassment case in workplaces that range from the military to Wall Street have caused organizations to pay for not preventing sexual contact. Even suggestive words alone have been cause for creating a hostile workplace.

You say there is no power differential so you must be talking about co-workers. How closely are the work stations of  the individuals who might date? In the same work unit dating can, and usually does, feed gossip and create problems. And does this mean that dating is taboo???

NO is my answer. Many a lasting romantic relationship has blossomed from seeing one to whom you are attracted at work. So go for it. But go for it discreetly. Quiet dating, outside the workplace, can help prevent some of the gossip and possible antagonism that sometimes comes, when and/or if a relationship sours.

Let's give a rousing cheer for love in the workplace. Such a finding is not without research that has found higher morale and commitment to one's job when it happens.

Wego has special significance for those who find love there.

Sincerely,

Bill Gorden